A Better Vote for 2016

I've always been a firm believer that, if you don't exercise your right to vote in an election, then you've waived your rights to complain about who others have elected.  This year though, I've honestly considered waiving all my rights to complain, and not vote for anyone as president.  My reasoning is, no matter who's elected, I'll still have the right to say, "not my fault".

One day however, I realized I know exactly who I'll be voting for in 2016.  Continue on, and discover why I believe these two fine creatures will make the perfect president and vice president for our ailing country.

The most obvious thing you'll notice about my candidates, (and what is the foundation of their campaign), they both have great hair and personalities.  Never mind what the photo at the bottom of this post shows, the candidates can be very personable, and downright friendly, if approached properly.

Though, like Donald Trump, my presidential candidate is quite orange, their hair is much, much nicer, and real looking, than Trump's.

For those hoping to see a woman president in 2016, my candidate fits the bill perfectly, and as a bonus, has a nicer demeanor than Hillary Clinton.

Beyond looks and personalities, my candidates are capable of tackling the real issues of the day. For instance, though they are complete opposites, my hopefuls prove daily that it's possible for anyone to get along, if they at least try.

They're able to relay great messages to future voters.  They live what they believe, demonstrating this by getting plenty of sleep and exercise, and practicing good eating, dental and hygiene habits. 

Many have said that my candidates are excellent at putting others at ease, allowing those around them to relax and melt away their stress.  To me, this is a great quality every president and vice president should have.

Once in the White House, there are several ways my candidates can save taxpayers money.  My presidential hopeful has extensive experience with pest control, and therefore would not need to call in outside exterminators, should the need arise.

There wouldn't be a need to maintain a blaring alarm system in the White House, with my vice presidential hopeful in residence.  The candidate is nearly overqualified at being able to throw their voice loudly for great distances.  For those who don't think this is enough protection, rest assured, both candidates are professional protectors and guardians to all those around them; and though they are polite and friendly, you wouldn't want to do something you shouldn't; it wouldn't end well for you.

Above all, my candidates will save even more taxpayer dollars by not taking any paychecks during their tenure at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.  Yes, that's correct, they will ask for no money while in office.  Instead, they would only require food and water on a regular basis, plenty of treats, and an occasional toy or two on special occasions and holidays.

Yes, after much consideration, the political candidates I've described above are the ones I'll be voting for this November. You may have figured out by now where this post is going.  If not, I now present my candidates for president and vice president in 2016:  Rusty Predmore and Buttons Falan.