Holiday Gifts & Daily Jokes

Normally I try not write posts that are "downers"; sometimes though, as with the shooting at Clackamas Town Center, I have to get my emotions out.

Before the shooting, I'd had another post planned for today.  Not *quite* a downer post, just not as upbeat as I try to be.  Again, until I get the emotions out, it will gnaw at me.

With that said, today's post is what I'd originally intended to write.  It was inspired by talk on "Simon in the Morning" yesterday, involving two separate subjects.

The first thing that had me thinking about writing this post had to do with gifting certain people at Christmas time.  The discussion had to do with should you "tip", (for lack of a better word), the mailman, your garbage man, your hairdresser, etc., extra at this time of year; and how much?

Now, I'm not an inconsiderate person; I understand tipping people, etc., for a job well done, on a daily basis.  But $10 to $25 per person, because it's Christmas time; as a gift?  I for one can't afford that; I barely make it through getting for my family, let alone others.

Okay, yes, if you're really close to the person, then yeah, why not?  However, if you're not, you're supposed to give them something anyway? To be honest, I don't have a clue what my garbage man looks like.  For all I know, it's not even the same person from week to week.

A newspaper delivery person called in to the show, saying how he counts on those "tips" every year, to help him buy his Christmas gifts; that kind of struck a nerve with me.  While I understand that this person's job isn't easy, (up very early, having to deliver papers no matter what the weather is like, etc.), why is anyone expected to give this person even $10, so they can buy Christmas presents for their family?  Yes, I realize, it's the season of giving, and I sound very selfish; it's not meant that way.

How about instead of cash, or a check, the money is donated to a charity in that person's name?  At least that way the money would go to those who need it even more than myself, or the person waiting for the gift.  Yeah, we're probably both strapped for cash; but the money would at least be going to those who need it even more than we do.

Now that I've said my piece on that, (just my opinion of course), on to the next subject from yesterday's "Simon in the Morning":  Practical jokes.

Practical jokes have been around for eons.  Most are harmless fun, though some aren't.  A lot of that, I think, has to do with the person, or persons doing the joke, whether it's done in jest, or with malice, and how far the joke is taken.

For awhile now, the "Simon in the Morning" team have been doing what they call "Simonizers".  A listener will call, or email asking Scott, Jolynn and Jake to pull a joke on a friend, family member, or co-worker. The morning team then set up the joke, make the phone call, record it, and play it back on the air at a later time.

Since the prank call of someone impersonating the Queen of England, and the resulting suicide of the nurse who took the call, people have been questioning the practice. Several people emailed the morning team saying they should stop.  Others said they shouldn't have started it at all.

Because Scott, Jolynn and Jake truly care what their listeners think, they opened the subject up to their audience.  While there were those who said it should be stopped, there were several callers who said no, it's all in fun, keep "Simonizing" people.

And as the morning team was quick to explain, they never mean any harm, they always stop the joke before someone gets too upset, (if they do), and most importantly, they get everyone's permission to air the end result on the radio.

To be honest, I'm not sure yet whether the "Simonizing" will continue; the mall shooting has been the current subject since then.  We'll have to see, once things settle down and get back into a normal routine.

Kenny Chesney & Going Bald

(Today's KUPL Listener Blog word is in the post below this one.)

By now anyone who listens to country has heard Kenny Chesney's latest single, "Come Over".  For those who haven't though, I'll add the video in this post:

I know I'm not the only one who, upon hearing this song for the first time, heard the lyrics differently.  There are very few people who *don't* hear "COMB over", instead of  "COME over".  The fact that Chesney himself is bald just adds to the humor of the mix up.  When things get stuck in my head, I have to do something about it; in this case, it was to rewrite "Come Over", to "Comb Over". 

As I always do, I worked over each line of the song, trying to come up with a new story, while still keeping the rhythm and rhyme of the original tune.  When I had it done, I did what I usually do, sent it to Scott, Jolynn and Jake, from KUPL's "Simon in the Morning" show.  By now they've gotten used to my craziness, and take it in stride.

With this rewrite though, Jake emailed me and said once the real song was higher up the charts, he wanted to have the parody done professionally!   WOW!!!   And that's exactly what happened; when "Come Over" hit the top five of the country charts Jake sent it off to be produced.  Before that however, he explained that most parodies don't use every line of the actual song.  He edited out some parts, and tweaked a few of the lines, to tighten them up; my first parody co-write!  I thought that was really cool!

This morning, I got an email from Jake, with the audio of  "Comb Over" attached; the parody had come to life!  I loved it, and was thrilled to hear something I'd had a hand in actually being performed.  I emailed Jake, thanking him for all his help with "Comb Over", and asked if I could write a post about it.  He said of course, then asked if my blog supports audio; bummer, it doesn't, so back to the drawing board I went.

In the meantime, unbeknownst to me, Jake was working up something of his own.  This afternoon, I got another email from Jake, with a link to a video he'd made for our parody!  Because of that, I'm now able to share with readers Jake's and my song rewrite, "Comb Over".  Please let us know what you think!

Simon in the Morning's "Hunger Games"

Twice a day for the past week, the "Simon in the Morning" show has been hosting their version of the "Hunger Games".

Each morning at 6:20am, and 8:20am, Scott, Jolynn and Jake would announce two "districts", (zip codes), to compete against each other.  One caller from each zip code would call in and be given a type of food to name off.  Each person would name a food from that day's category, and the first person to take longer than 5 seconds was eliminated.

My zip code was announced at 6:20 Tuesday morning, so I called, and actually got through.  I and the person I was pitted against had to come up with various ways to prepare eggs.

I don't remember all the types we came up with, except the other person did say "candied" eggs at one point.   No one was sure what that meant, however, I thought it could mean the candy eggs like you get at Easter.  The last type I mentioned was "poached", and the other person couldn't come up with another type, so she was eliminated.

I was excited that I'd qualified for the trip to see Taylor Swift in Ontario, Canada; however, did I really think I'd win the grand prize?  No, I didn't.  I knew I'd have a 1 in 10 chance, however, I just didn't think it would happen.

On Friday, the final two were qualified for the grand prize, and a few minutes later Scott, Jolynn and Jake were to announce the grand prize winner.

I know that when a winner is picked, it takes time to call them, get it recorded for playback on the air, etc.  That usually means a winner is picked and called right away.  I was at work, waiting to start my day, and my phone wasn't ringing, so I knew I wasn't going to be the winner.  The longer the phone didn't ring, the more certain I was I didn't win.

All of a sudden though, my phone DID ring, and it was an outside line.  The caller ID was KUPL's number!  So, I answered the phone, and there they were on the other side of the line, Scott, Jolynn and Jake!  They asked if I knew why they were calling and I said I thought so; then Jolynn said, yeah, they'd just called to talk with me and tell me who'd won the contest.

 Normally it's hard to pull anything over on me; I'm not a trusting person, and don't take things at face value.  In this case though, already having it in my mind that I wasn't going to win, the length of time it took for the phone call, and the fact that I'm always giving them a bad time, (teasing), I figured maybe they really HAD called just to tell me who the winner had been!  I was totally suckered on that, and I give them kudos for getting me good!

As it turns out, *I* AM the grand prize winner to go see Taylor Swift in Ontario, Canada!!!  The whole process of picking the grand prize winner was even the subject of the Simon 90 video for the day.

Needless to say, that was around 9am; I haven't quite been the same since!  I honestly don't think I really breathed for about 2 hours after I found out I'd won! 

I know I can get very excited about things, so instead of rambling on and on about it from now, until the day of the show, I've told everyone I work with, all my friends and  family, if I start getting hyper again, I'll just say "EEK!"  Translation:  "I'm sooooooooooooo excited!", and leave it at that.  After all, winning is one thing, however I'd like to keep my family, friends and co-workers; not drive them away!

Never Thought It Would Go This Far...

It's been about a month since the "Simon in the Morning" team had a discussion about cartoons, cartoon voices and the Muppets. At the time the whole thing got jumbled around in my head, until I finally did something about it; I created caricatures of Scott, Jolynn and Jake.

From the beginning, (jokingly), Scott has always commented on how his caricature is shorter and wider than Jolynn or Jake.  At one point, I decided to "give in" to Scott and make him taller and thinner.  So, I wrote another blog and introduced readers to the "taller, thinner Scott Simon".  Basically, I put the head of Scott's caricature on the body of Jake's caricature, thus making Scott taller and thinner.  I didn't stop there however.  I also noticed that Jolynn and Jake have hair, and Scott doesn't.  So I took the hair from Jolynn's caricature and added it to the taller, thinner Scott Simon.

Thought that was the end of it, until I was talking to B-Dub at the Kenny Chesney pre-party.  He asked my name, and when I told him, he said, "you're the one that created the caricatures; where's mine?"  I told B-Dub I'd see what I could do, which I did, and sent it to him.

I'd also created a caricature for Eduard, the new producer of "Simon in the Morning".

After that, I decided I definitely needed to create caricatures of Lola and TicTak; didn't want to leave them out when the other on air staff had caricatures.  Got those done, and sent them off to Lola, TicTak and the morning team.

Of course, the first thing Scott noticed is that he was still the widest, (actually, he said shortest and widest; however, he and Lola's caricatures are the same height).

At that point, I figured that was the end of it; not quite.  The morning team posted the pics of Lola and TicTak on the KUPL Facebook page; and Lola also posted hers on her page.

Because of all this, now is the time to post what I've been working on since Scott first mentioned being wider and shorter.  I'd told him, if I did my caricature, it would definitely be shorter and wider than his, because I *am* shorter and wider than Scott!

With that said, here it is, the caricature of ME!